fiber optic communication systems agrawal solution manual free download. One step forward, one step back This next bit of advice is going to feel a little difficult to pull off. Guys only want someone hotter and prettier than me. Also, consider this: when our social life— which includes our love life—is nonexistent, the lack of love and connection can poison much of the success we get in other areas of our lives. I am going to tell you how.">
What makes them even longer is that these interactions are probably happening by chance, and certainly not because they are men you have selected yourself. If I asked the same question of a male reader, the number would be just as small. Both sexes are guilty of leaving their love lives to chance.
The fate-will-bring-me-love approach lacks urgency, which leads to lack of action. You assume that when the time is right the right guy will come along, and in the meantime you focus on your work, your ambitions, your family, your friends, your hobbies.
When people put aside their love life to focus on these other areas, years pass, and one day the lack of urgency turns into panic. We become frantic as we realize that not only is nothing happening in our love life, but we are at a loss as to how to make it happen, which of course leads to more panic, creating a loop of frustration, at best, or worse, hopelessness.
You may be reading this book because you keep asking yourself and perhaps your sisters, girlfriends, and coworkers , Where are all the good men to be found?
You are going to have to go out and find him. A word of encouragement before you set out to meet the man of your dreams: Life is full of people who wait. They wait for the right moment to approach someone, or wait for someone to approach them first. They wait to feel confident before taking action. Wait, wait, wait, for everything. Waiters imagine they are playing it safe, but more often than not, only two things come to those who wait: the wrong thing or no-thing.
Ask yourself: Right now, at this very moment, am I waiting or am I creating? Am I taking the positive steps which will give me results in my love life? If your answer is no, take heart; simply by reading this book you are already taking action, seeking the knowledge that will enable you to make the changes necessary to make rapid progress.
The knowledge that you are moving forward, improving, and developing in a significant way is what makes humans happy. There is only one way to wait: just do nothing. But there are thousands of ways to create, so the opportunities are endless. I know your goal is not to meet as many men as possible, but to meet your man, the one who is going to add more meaning to your life.
You might think he is fine—or, even better, perfect for you. But since you have nothing to compare him with, you risk settling for less than you deserve. No one is perceptive enough to call it correctly with only one choice. A single shot does not allow you to choose the best for yourself. And, you never, ever want to settle. If you want to have a better chance of finding the right guy, you have to begin with meeting more men.
Not one more, not two more, but a lot more. The more men you meet, the more you increase your chances of finding the right one. Imagine attending a party where there are two hundred men in the room. Out of these two hundred guys, how many would you feel even remotely attracted to?
Maybe twenty? Out of this twenty, there might be only ten to whom you felt enough attraction to consider a first date. From this remaining ten, how many would you feel sufficient chemistry with to want to date again? And from these five last men standing, there may be only one with whom you could deeply connect. Many might say that even these figures are wildly optimistic. Anywhere from four years to. I want to share a collection of stubborn myths about guys and love that refuse to go away.
These mad and bad beliefs do you no good and only hold you back:. There are no good men out there All the men I meet are either gay, taken, or weird. Guys only want someone hotter and prettier than me. Guys only want a low-maintenance woman, not someone who will challenge them.
Every single one of these is a myth. Sadly, they are not only false, but they are dangerous to hold on to and often become excuses for all that is wrong in your love life. Most of us have had painful experiences in love. Love hurts, as the song says. Summary: A leading relationship expert, corporate coach, and rising media personality-- the star of NBC's new prime time reality show "Ready for Love"-- offers women a guide book that reveals the secrets of the male mind and the fundamentals of dating.
Language: English Contents: Find the guy. Put the odds in your favor ; Being a woman of high value ; Get a social life that serves your love life ; The mindset of the chooser ; The traits of desirable women ; The white handkerchief approach ; From great conversation to first date ; The joy of text ; A word about online dating -- Get the guy. The ultimate formula for attraction ; A word about insecurity ; The art of creating the great date ; The sex talk part I ; Stuck in the friend trap ; Why hasn't he called?
Within the next week my single friends began getting dates with men who appealed to them. Those in relationships started saying their boyfriends were treating them with more respect, admiration, and attraction.
Word spread. E- mails flooded my inbox from women with dating and relationship questions. I began conducting private coaching sessions. This was the beginning of what would be a years-long journey of working with fifty thousand women in Get the Guy events, and with millions online, to help them find love.
The contents of this book are the result of what I have been thinking about, teaching, and refining over the past four years. The next morning they return to the seminar and recount their stories. It is my hope that you will do the same after reading this book. Get the Guy is meant to be a double entendre. Some of it might strike you as a little blunt, but were I writing a book for men I would be just as direct about what they should be doing to find women, and believe me, the book would be much longer.
Think of me as your personal insider, the guy in your corner. I know there is a lot of information out there about how to improve your love life.
These are the shallow and deep ends of the spectrum and may well have value. With a proper model, you will be successful.
It has nothing to do with luck or fate or Cupid showing up with bow and arrow. Your love life is not determined by romantic notions and magical thinking, but rather by a set of conditions that everyone and anyone can create. My model is based on three basic ideas: 1.
Learning simple, new behaviors that allow you to meet more guys and choose those you like 2. Understanding how men think and what they want 3. Creating a high-value lifestyle that will draw men to you and satisfy you with or without your guy The book is organized by techniques for finding the guy, getting the guy, and keeping the guy.
This part of the book focuses primarily on how to increase your odds of meeting the right guy. You will learn that the theories that apply in the beginning are also relevant at the end. However, I wanted to overdeliver for you, so I have taken strategic snippets from my live seminars—which women fly from all over the world to attend— and put them online. In these videos, I speak directly to you with the hope that your reading experience is enhanced, and you get the most from this book.
And here is my promise to you: if you read this book, watch the videos, and truly put the advice into practice, you will meet more guys, your love life will improve, and ultimately so will your life. How long will it take to meet Mr. Right if you are meeting only one new man in an average week? What makes them even longer is that these interactions are probably happening by chance, and certainly not because they are men you have selected yourself.
If I asked the same question of a male reader, the number would be just as small. Both sexes are guilty of leaving their love lives to chance. The fate-will-bring-me-love approach lacks urgency, which leads to lack of action. When people put aside their love life to focus on these other areas, years pass, and one day the lack of urgency turns into panic. We become frantic as we realize that not only is nothing happening in our love life, but we are at a loss as to how to make it happen, which of course leads to more panic, creating a loop of frustration, at best, or worse, hopelessness.
You are going to have to go out and find him. And how do you find him? Waiting or Creating A word of encouragement before you set out to meet the man of your dreams: Life is full of people who wait. They wait for the right moment to approach someone, or wait for someone to approach them first. They wait to feel confident before taking action. Wait, wait, wait, for everything. Ask yourself: Right now, at this very moment, am I waiting or am I creating?
Am I taking the positive steps which will give me results in my love life? If your answer is no, take heart; simply by reading this book you are already taking action, seeking the knowledge that will enable you to make the changes necessary to make rapid progress. The knowledge that you are moving forward, improving, and developing in a significant way is what makes humans happy. Wherever you feel you are right now, you still have a choice: you can wait or you can create.
There is only one way to wait: just do nothing. But there are thousands of ways to create, so the opportunities are endless. Go to www. You might think he is fine—or, even better, perfect for you. But since you have nothing to compare him with, you risk settling for less than you deserve. No one is perceptive enough to call it correctly with only one choice. A single shot does not allow you to choose the best for yourself. And, you never, ever want to settle.
If you want to have a better chance of finding the right guy, you have to begin with meeting more men. Not one more, not two more, but a lot more. The more men you meet, the more you increase your chances of finding the right one. Imagine attending a party where there are two hundred men in the room. Out of these two hundred guys, how many would you feel even remotely attracted to? Maybe twenty? Out of this twenty, there might be only ten to whom you felt enough attraction to consider a first date.
From this remaining ten, how many would you feel sufficient chemistry with to want to date again? And from these five last men standing, there may be only one with whom you could deeply connect. Many might say that even these figures are wildly optimistic. Anywhere from four years to. I want to share a collection of stubborn myths about guys and love that refuse to go away.
Guys only want someone hotter and prettier than me. Guys only want a low-maintenance woman, not someone who will challenge them. Every single one of these is a myth.
Sadly, they are not only false, but they are dangerous to hold on to and often become excuses for all that is wrong in your love life. Most of us have had painful experiences in love. Love hurts, as the song says. But when we have been let down by someone, we have to be careful not to let that experience, however awful, become our sole reference point for future relationships. If you set aside all the myths and generalizations, if you set aside whatever bad experiences you may have had with men and refuse to allow them to color your judgment, I will reveal to you all the facets and secrets of the male mind, the good, the bad, and all the things he desires from the woman in his life.
The Philosophy of the Funnel Now that you are committed to expanding your options by meeting a lot more men, I am going to offer a proven system, a method to all of this man-meeting.
It is a process best visualized as a series of funnels. The first funnel is the largest, into which you pour all the new men you meet. Of those, only a select few will pass into the fourth funnel, those who are worth more than just one date. Of course the final filtering will result in finding the guy with whom you want a relationship. We will dig into that process in the second and third parts of the book. For now, we are simply getting you to the place of opportunity.
The process is clear and obvious, but there is one important principle I want to emphasize: the first funnel is where we are least selective. The first funnel is not about attraction. It is about meeting new people, both men and women. The first funnel is about getting out there.
Out into the world you go, with the goal of meeting as many guys as possible, so that you have more guys to pour into the first funnel. Pouring only three guys into that first funnel makes it highly unlikely that the right guy will come out the other end. Most of us are so focused on meeting The One that we wind up not meeting anyone.
If I could, I would tattoo this on your palm: every interaction with another human being is a possible gateway to some new world or experience, which could, in turn, introduce you to the love of your life.
There are other good reasons to meet as many men as you can: Abundance, not scarcity When you meet lots of men, you put less focus on any one man.
Approaching your love life from a position of abundance rather than scarcity helps to put the odds in your favor. It is making simple economics work for you. As much as you might be agonizing over one guy, always remember, men are 50 percent of the population.
Scarcity makes us settle. Abundance, on the other hand, leads to choice and confidence. Abundance comes when we start increasing the number of men going into that first funnel.
As soon as you heartily believe that there are plenty of men out there, you can adopt an easy come, easy go attitude and begin to have fun with all of this. Creating new habits Make a habit of talking to new people. It will do wonders for increasing your basic social skills, which will in turn boost your confidence.
This happens simply by doing it more often, and applies not only for men but for anyone at all: women, children, young and old. If you are in the habit of meeting more people in general, it will by default lead you to meet more men.
Why do you think you revert back to a being a blushing, nervous schoolgirl when that hot guy approaches you? This will allow you to be selective. We should all be extremely fussy when it comes to love. The person you spend most of your time with, are intimate with, share your life with, and whom you trust the most needs to be extraordinary for you specifically.
There are extraordinary people everywhere, but it will take some filtering to find that certain someone who fills your particular needs and desires. Logically, then, to find that special person, you will need to increase your chances of success by meeting many men.
Yes, I know. Some people do get lucky. I once knew a young woman named Jane who, while sitting in her first college class waiting for the lecturer to arrive, met the love of her life. An attractive and friendly young man happened to sit down right next to her. They joked together, and went for coffee after the lecture. A month later they were seeing each other regularly and ultimately began a relationship that lasted throughout her university years.
She told all her friends that he was The One. She envisaged getting married at twenty-five, with kids to follow a couple of years later. She had it all planned out. Her friends were a little envious. They wondered how it was so easy for her. All of a sudden, at age twenty-five, Jane found herself back in the dating game, heartbroken and wondering where and how she would ever meet someone again.
She patiently waited for another Mr. Right to come along, but nothing happened. She daydreamed that perhaps the guy sitting at the next desk at her new job would be attractive and friendly and introduce himself, just as her first love did.
She spent Friday and Saturday nights going out with her friends, talking about how impossible it was to find someone like the man she once had. She had won the lottery of love at eighteen and spent seven years enjoying the winnings. But at twenty-five she was bankrupt, and now she was seven years older without any idea how to get back out there. Because her limited experience had taught her that the right man was supposed to sit down next to you and start a relationship with you on an unexpected day, she had no skills to make it happen.
Most lottery winners even those who win millions find a way to go broke again. They have no formula they can replicate. They have the skills to get back into the game and create something from nothing, and know that waiting will get them nowhere. Jane thought her only option was to sit around and wait. Rituals: The Best-Kept Secret of the Successful Rituals are the best-kept secret of anyone who has ever succeeded in business, love, fitness, family life, learning a foreign language, or any other area.
Following rituals creates a positive association, which in turn results in a positive outcome. The rituals that we are looking at here are designed specifically to help you meet more men. Increasing the number of new men you meet each week—from, say, one to three or four—would have a dramatic impact on your love life in just a few months. Four new men each week equals two hundred new men in a year. That incremental weekly increase would totally transform the entire landscape of your dating.
How would your life have to change right now if you set yourself the challenge of meeting two hundred new guys in the next twelve months? Not date two hundred guys, just meet two hundred. Some of them might lead to dates, but for now, imagine just starting a five-minute conversation with two hundred new guys this year. What would you have to do differently? How would you have to spend your time differently from the way you spend it now? Sustainable change is rarely created by one huge action with dramatic results.
What is essential is that the process is natural and easy to assimilate, so that our love life takes care of itself while still letting us go about our normal routine.
Since it is so easy to make small changes for a big return, you can take control of your love life beginning today. I get frustrated by TV shows that take a woman with no confidence and no social life, who has difficulty finding a relationship, and claim they are going to give her an instant total makeover and turn her into a new woman.
They then busy themselves changing her makeup, hairstyle, and wardrobe—all of which results only in a change in appearance. The implication is that all that was missing from her life was that her look needed updating.
I have nothing against working on how we look; establishing rituals that maintain our health, fitness, and physical appearance has great value, but on their own these will produce no more than a small shift in our love life. The effects of such a makeover are temporary. Yes, I know it can be great TV, but no speedy external makeover addresses the greater task at hand of finding and keeping the right man for you.
So, what are those rituals that will put you on the right path to your man? And how do we enact them? Read on. Meet New People Everywhere The key is to learn how to create conversations everywhere we go.
Here are some rituals we can implement to ensure that we constantly exercise these social muscles. Converse with all service staff Make a habit of talking to everyone who serves you: wait staff, baristas, salespeople, doormen, the UPS man.
Try to make every conversation go one step further. Aim to get their names, or find out where they live, or find out one simple fact about them. Tell him something nice about his smile for no reason other than to make him feel good. Service staff are supposed to be nice to you, so take advantage of it. Talk to anyone reading a book Speak to anyone you see holding a book you have read or want to read.
You could simply ask if they are enjoying it or whether they would recommend it. Talk to any guy playing with an iPad or any other gadget Chatting with a guy about his gadgets is easy. Every guy loves to show them off and tell you all about them. Ask him what his favorite app is, or what model he recommends getting, or what the best thing about it is.
In the coffee shop, talk to the person next to you in line You could ask him to move away so you can grab something off a shelf, or you could ask if he would hold your umbrella while you fish out your wallet from your purse.
Compliment three people a day Clothing, shoes, and eyeglasses are easy to compliment within reason, of course. Provide a random act of kindness to one person each day Hold the door open for someone. If you are driving, smile and let another car go ahead of you in traffic.
Help an elderly person cross the street. Buy someone you barely know a cup of coffee. Even exchanges seemingly unrelated to our love life have a cumulative effect on our confidence and our ease with spontaneous interactions. If you struggle to talk to any strangers, start small. All these rituals can be built into your everyday life. They might seem small, but it is foolish to underestimate the power of small actions undertaken with regularity.
The state of your love life one year from now will be a direct reflection of the rituals you set for yourself today. Over the course of our lives most of us meet a fraction of the people we could have met. You can probably already think of someone wonderful who has been in your life only because at one point you took a chance and made conversation with him or her.
These actions are small in the moment, but they can have enormous consequences. Remember to create rituals that require you to perform a specific action. Within one week of adopting these specific new behavioral rituals, you will feel and look like a social animal, even though it requires so little effort within your daily routine. Taking action now is what is required; we get more results from action than we do from waiting.
This kind of procrastination is common. It is easy to justify inactivity this way. This goes for meeting men as well. Suppose you set yourself a new ritual of talking to two new men on the way to work every day for the next year. You met him randomly on the way to work one day. You were only lucky in the sense that he happened to be there on a particular day.
What enabled you to meet him was the new ritual you had established. You found love because you set out to find love and made it happen. This next video is intended to help instill in you the right mindset before you get too far in. And we have to be extraordinary not only for others, we have to do it for ourselves.
Getting the guy starts with raising your game, raising your standards, and understanding from the start that you are a woman of high value. What do I mean by a woman of high value? I recently asked my friend Sylvia what kind of man she was looking for and she reeled off a list of terrific qualities. The man of her dreams would be outgoing, with great friends. He would be honest, bold, adventurous, with direction and purpose, passion and confidence.
He would know what he wanted out of life and live up to his own high standards. In other words, Sylvia wants someone extraordinary. Because believe me, Mr. Right, wherever he is out there, wants the same thing. Right is hoping to find a woman of high value. Obviously, we all possess our own unique personalities, our own individual likes and dislikes, our own opinions, specific things that drive us mad or make us laugh, but there are traits that all high-value women possess.
They are self- confidence, independence, integrity, and femininity. Cultivating these traits is the first step toward finding the love you deserve. Self-Confidence Certainty is the primary attribute of the high-value woman.
The definition of confidence is the state of feeling certain about the truth of something, and the high-value woman is confident about her worth. She knows her abilities, her appeal, and what she deserves.
A woman who is certain about herself has a deep feeling of self-worth that informs all her other attributes.
If she is not getting what she wants or needs from a relationship, the self-confident woman will feel comfortable articulating her needs or walking away from a less- than-fulfilling union. This is true in the earliest stages of meeting guys as well— if the man you are talking to is boring the hell out of you, or a blowhard, a self- confident woman will politely extricate herself instead of wasting her time.
Displaying self-confidence can be playful. Not long ago I was in Los Angeles, heading to the airport to catch a flight. I remember thinking, This is so cool. This guy is so secure in himself. This, I thought, is exactly the kind of confidence people should have. Not arrogant, not full of self-importance, but relaxed and a little amused about how sensational we know ourselves to be.
Certainty turns out to be one of the sexiest qualities you can possess. She knows for a fact that when the right guy does come along, committing to her will be the best decision he will ever make in his life. I once watched a documentary about a couple who had been happily married for forty years. It was obvious that even after all these years they were still in love. You were so lucky! No one could have pleased you as I did. She knew with absolute certainty that she was the best thing that ever happened to him.
The self-confident woman is comfortable in social situations, even if she is shy. She is neither intimidated nor overly impressed because a guy has looks, money, or high status. She knows that she is worth more than all of these things. Uncertain people are followers, looking to others for approval. But the truth is that nothing snuffs out attraction quicker than when a guy picks up on uncertainty.
When he senses that you are doing something out of character just to try to please him, he will sense it is because you feel unworthy of him. Confidence trumps compliance every time. So your self-confidence becomes a mirror for his sense of self.
This is true of most interactions with other people, but it is especially true of romantic interactions between men and women. Women are better at reading body signals, better at sensing the mood of the room, better at interpreting pretty much all nonverbal cues, but a guy can always sense when a women is uncertain of herself. He can feel insecurity a mile away. Generally speaking, a confident and secure man will lose interest in a woman if he senses insecurity.
A woman who is certain knows what she is looking for in a man and never settles for less than her highest standards. He wants the woman who already knows that she is good enough for him. Independence and self-determination are important traits of the high-value woman. She has a life that she adores and is engaged in meaningful activities that make her passionate about each day.
She may have a job she loves, but she also fills her leisure time with activities that appeal to her creatively and emotionally. She surrounds herself with people who reinforce her values and her confidence. Her life is her own. This advice applies to your life with or without a man. It all connects back to the issue of being choosy. In that way you can be more selective about the man you decide gets to spend time with you. A fuller life will help you choose your man wisely. So what is a guy thinking when he meets an independent woman?
He wants in. One of the most common male fears about relationships is the fear of being smothered. You can approach this male instinct by appealing to his ego: you welcome him to be part of your life. These cookies allow you to explore OverDrive services and use our core features. Without these cookies, we can't provide services to you. These cookies allow us to monitor OverDrive's performance and reliability. They alert us when OverDrive services are not working as expected. Without these cookies, we won't know if you have any performance-related issues that we may be able to address.